I buy into those eyes, and into your light.

You say you'll call but I know you,

you say you're coming home but I know you,

you say you'll call but I know you won't.

You say you'll call but I know you won't.

WOW. DROP DEAD. LITERALLY. I HATE YOU.

Tonight I said something I thought I would never say in my life. And it was simply "I could never regret them." It's true. I could never regret the past three years, and being in love with love, and being in love with the thought of love.. and I couldn't even think of what I was doing for three years.. but now it's so perfect, for you, and not so much for me.

I don't know what to say to you, all I know is that I want just one more hug, one more embrace.. and I'll be fine.. I'll be fine..

Wow.

Cause hugs are overrated just FYI.

I didn't put cons for a reason.

Are you going to be waiting up when I get home?

Well, things suck. i had a conversation yesterday about small concerts..


I really miss those. Like when it was 100 people and half were parents.. and we just stood there dancing and looking up at Joe embarrassing himself. Those were really prime. And I miss them.. But then again, I like seeing Joe embarrass himself in from of 16,000 people.. its fun hahaha.

But yesterday, a lot of things came into perspective.. especially when we were driving and almost got in a car accident. That was wonderful. But I remember who those boys are.. and how weird Nick is when he laughs, and how funny Joe is, and how 'chipmunk' like Kevin is. And it made me smile.. mostly laugh, but smile. Because I realized that they still are "our boys" and we can never change that. Once you have met those boys once and had Joe laugh at you, or one of Kevin's hugs, or seen Nick blush.. it's over. You're hooked.


It's like a drug. And most drugs.. are bad. I think this one has its good.. and has its bad.

Pros:

• When you are in LA, you can always see them somewhere.. Even if it's on a billboard.
• If you think about it, you have met them, I mean, how many people can say that?
• Not many.
• And how many people can say that they have a poster that Joe Wrote: "Nicee. I like!" on it?
• NOT MANY.
• And how many people can say that they got a Nick picture when he smiled? NOT MANY.
• And how many people can say they got to see them when Joe's "area" and his legs were getting blood flow? NOT. VERY. MANY.
• And how many people can say they heard Nick perform "Nick J Is Off The Chain"?
• And how many people heard him perform One Day At A Time? NOT MANY.
• And what about "6 Minutes"? NOT MANY AT ALL.
• And WHAT ABOUT "I AM WHAT I AM"? How many people can say they heard that song?
• And "Yo Ho?" NOT MANY NO NO NOT MANY.
• And how many.. can say that they saw those boys, when they came on stage to "Snap Yo Fingers"? I can.

I can say it. I can say all of those things. Especially the Snap Yo Fingers one.. because Nick was such a dork. Hahaha.

And how many people can say they KNEW he had diabetes before he announced it? I can.

I guess that all this time we have lost sight of what's wrong and what's right. We wanted this, we voted for this, we made people buy their albums.. so why are we complaining? Because we aren't getting credit? Well, did you expect to get credit? You aren't the ones singing on stage for 2 hours every night. You aren't the ones going on non-stop tours. You aren't the ones who have to wake up at 2AM and get off the bus to go into the hotel to sleep. You aren't the one who can't even go see a movie without being bombarded by fans. You aren't the ones who have to wear sunglasses and scarves and hats while you are in public. You aren't the ones who don't get to have a personal life. You aren't the ones who can't have a girlfriend/boyfriend because you never see them. And you aren't the ones who gave up any sign of a normal life for the one everyone led you to.

SO WHY ARE YOU PISSED OFF? If you are like me, you are the one sitting out in the rain for 8 hours to by tickets. You are the ones sitting in the back of the 16,000 ampitheatre, with your poster that says "'05 & '06 FANS!" You are the ones crying during every song because you think they have "changed". GO LOOK AT YOUR PICTURES FROM WHEN YOU WERE 13 AND THEN NOW. Tell me you haven't changed, and I will show you 4567895678 people who have. If you think that you are going to sit there, and something is going to magically happen like, KEVIN is going to remember you from 2006 Bamboozle, think again. Don't just sit there and wait for something to happen.. do it for yourself. You are the one that was there on the way up, and will be there on the way down.

Sit in the back, and scream your loudest.
Cry during every song, cry your hardest.
Laugh when they are being dorks, laugh until you cry.
Remember all the times you had, because they won't be forgotten.
Forget all those fans who think they are the shit, because they aren't.
But mostly, remember the boys for who they were, they'll come back.. just let them have their moment.

And overall, support them. Can I get an AMEN?

Hold your head up high, you're never wrong...

Great things come in small packages, God works in strange ways, and the world spins on its axle no matter what happens in your life.


When things go wrong, I'm really glad that I have people to fall back on.
And when hearts get broken, I'm really glad to have people to rely on.
And when things go right, and hearts mend, someones always there to hold my hand.


Well, today was kind of... interesting. Nicky woke me up, surprise there. Then I got online, got to school at half past nine, and I still miss you. Yeah, except not so much. I got online lmao and then I talked to Nicolette for a while, and Ashton too. Kelly Michelle and Ashton aren't coming anymore... Which is really sad.. cause now I really have nothing to do. LMAO. Well, oh well. Hahaha

I'll find somethingg.


Anyways today was actually super fun. I got a few surprises.. went to the movies in LA with surprises and thenn came home and am now chilling.

Today's Life Lesson:

Friends are always there for you no matter what. Isn't that cool though? To know that no matter what, your friends are there. There to call you a fag, there to tell you to shut up, and there to help you plan out your vacations to the minute. Isn't that cool?


I love having best friends.


yes, yes I do.

Living out the same old moment..

Knowing you'd me better off instead

if you could only

say what you need to say,

say what you need to say,

say what you need to say..

So today was fun.Hahaha My spacebar is kinda broken hahaha. but whatever.







I'm bored





Hahahaha sorry. Moretomorrow





♥Al

These are the times I wish I had a bb gun..

THESE EFFING BIRDS ARE CHIRPING OUTSIDE MY WINDOW AGAIN.

DUDE WTFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

ITS

DRIVING

ME

INSANEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

I WANT TO SHOOT THEM

SAKBLSGJNFG

kay

im really going to bed now.

goodnighttt

Can't even call, on the telephone..

Don't even know if you're at home.

But to control just how we feel,

between you and I, not for one to steal.

Suddenly, I'm all alone, pushed away for nothing wrong.

Don't you have the guts to say how you feel about me?

Well, tonight was literally the most fun I have had in a while. The mall was a blast, and I loved 27 Dresses. We have so much fun making fun of people.. it's sickk.


Well tonight I realized that friends are amazing, and found something that I wrote about a year ago..

Friends who have a special bond, aren't with you one day, then not there the next. They are there no matter what. The ups, the downs, and everything in between. A friend is someone you can always count on to be there when you need someone to help you through, or back you up on something. Even when you're wrong, a friend is a one, who will stick up for you, right or wrong. When something isn't right, they tell you. Friends are people who will do anything and everything to make you feel better. They make you laugh in hard times, and make you cry when they say things that are sweet. Friends are always there no matter what you both are going through. When you have fights, you both make them better, not just one person. A friend is someone who loves you, and wants you to know it every second of the day. When you put up away messages that say sad things, they message you with a silly comment, or stupid joke, that makes you smile and makes you forget about your problems. A friend is someone you can count on to keep your secrets and never tell them. When you share something, they listen, and then comment on it. A friend, is just that. A person, who has a special connection with you. Friends are amazing.

Pretty cool huh?


Well, see, I love my friends, and I think that they are just.. crazyamazing. I love you all.


Now, I am going to bed, because there are NO birds chirping outside my window!!!

Tomorrow is Easter, and that's great and all, but I seriously don't want to go to the beach.. its gonna be sooooooooooooooo hot. Why do my grandparents' temporary condo have to be at the beach across from the Queen Mary! I hate it thereee.

Okay. Everyone have a great Sunday, and a great week. You all deserve it.


Love & All that
Al


oh P.S. -- I love texting ALL day lmao I just love it!! ♥

We sign our cards and letters BFFFFF.

They've got a million ways to make me laugh.
They're looking out for me, they've got my back.

It's so good to have them around.

Well tonight, my two best friends, Joyce and Nicolette, went to a concert. Nicolette told Kevy that I was proud of him and HE SAID THANK YOU. What. Freakin. Now. BITCHES??!?!?!??!?! WHAT FREAKIN NOW?!?!?!?! And he let Joyce kiss his cheek! AHHH! Partayy.

I learned that Nicolette approves of Joyce's new "love interest" (I still can't keep up, first it was Kevo then this other dude -- he ended up being gay i think?? -- and now Britton!). So, I think that Britton could be my new cousin-in-law. But I'm still hoping that Kevin marries Joyce and then I marry Nicholas and then we are sisters.. and Nicolette can have Joe(HAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.)

Nicolette PROCEEDED to say "REE" all day in text messages to me. I swear, REE does not mean RETARDED. I mean, can't you just spell out the word?! And gee.. wtffff is that? It certainly is not COOL.

Well, Princess Nicolette also called me a faggot like 203984 times.



Well tonight I realized a few things. On one hand, I realized that best friends are there to make up for everything you have ever lost in your life, even if you think nothing can fill that spot. I also realized that when you feel like you have hit rock bottom, there's always some cool rocks down there, ya know? Nicolette's a damn shiny rock, and Joyce's rock is bedazzled. And Nick Jonas's has a hat on it, Joe's is furry, and Kevin's has snake skin shoes!!

So when you hit rock bottom, make sure you look around, because you never know who could be sitting down there with you for a while, and maybe you can help each other, and float back up to the surface, because without someone there to support you, and call you a stupid Russian, and a fag every five minutes, you won't get back up there. Get your ass off the sand, and pick up some rocks, because some of them are filled with amazing jewels.

So swallow your pride, and ask for some help. That's the best way to go.


Love and Peace,
Princess Ali "Ree"

Oh and P.S.

Tell me, IS SHE WORTH IT?

Is she worth this?

State the obvious, You'll never get your perfect fantasy.

You're a red neck heartbreak,
who's really bad at lying.
So by the way, your gay.



So, tonight, I found out that one of my closest friends, has flipped and flopped and ended up doing something she swore, many times may I add, she would NEVER do.

I also found out that this means next week, I am completely free. Wellllllll. Not completely ;)

Other than that little smily winky face thing I got plannnned..

I am going to disney one day with Adriennneee and Elena and maybee Julian(my cousin), and CLUB 33 woooo. So I am excited for that.


Otherwise, I am literally sitting here planning revenge!


Oh, and thanks to Joyce and Nicolette for putting my name on the card that will be attatched to the scissors you give Joseph. So nice of you!! Oh P.S., have fun!!


I'm super excited for this summer, because Nicolette and JOYCE are bothhhhhhhhhh coming out here. The dates are TOP SECRET, I can't release them to you just yet, because wowowow Joyce is a celebritay and people will stalk us all. But wwowow, partyyyy.

Anyways.




I learned tonight that the more you complain about your life, the worse it gets. So when you complain, you end up somewhere in life you don't really want to be.. but you take it because you don't know what else to do. So to people who are in those places, I got a few words from Emily the other night that helped me see a "light" at the middle of the "tunnel"(Yeah, the middle, I'm not even THERE yet.) but the words were "Things that bring you down, are meant to make you stronger, so you can build them back up." Well, amazing advice, and I am taking it. I hope that challenges in life are harder, and more difficult to get over, because then, I will become stronger.


So to that one person right now, you know who you are, you are starting to hurt yourself now by cheating all of us.

A lot of things in my life are going down hill, and whenever they take a step back UP the hill, they take 5 steps down. Things get better, then worse. People have always told me in my life, things will get worse before they get better.. not better, then worse, then better.. then worse. But I am going to just hope and pray that everything will work itself out in the end.

Right now I am really really confused about everything in life that I want, and need. I don't know what I am going to do in school right now.. I kind of want to go to Elmo(ELMODINAAAA) but at the same time, I TOTALLY DON'T.


It's kind of weird, how we all grow up with dreams, and hopes for ourselves, and as we grow up, our parents grow with us, and build on top of those dreams and hopes.. Well, if you build a tower out of building blocks, and then throw a brick on top, do you think it's going to keep standing? No, it will fall; smash to pieces even. But if you were to just throw a few rocks at it at a time.. it might withstand them. Well, a bunch of rocks are being thrown at me right now, and a giant brick is sitting on top.

It's stress, and power, and love, and complicated and confusing.. and invigorating.

I miss my best friends, and I miss them so much it's literally tearing me apart from my life.

Build that tower as high as you can, the brick will be smaller if you do.


Al

Do cookies explode in microwaves?

Well, my dad thinks so. He told me not to heat up my cookies in the microwave! But I did anyways


They didn't explode.


But so I went to stick one in my glass of milk, right? And it like SIZZLED!!!!!!!!!!!!! And burned my finger. IT HURTS SO BAD. Do cookies explode in microwaves? No. Do they explode in milk? YES.


Kay,
nicolette is so not GEEEEE


BYEE!! :)

ali

A stupid girl named Ali..

Went to feed her three dogs and ended up spilling their dog food ALL over the kitchen.

Great, ehh?

I know. Nicolette hacked my myspacee. Hahaha.


And made my song what it is. lmaooo

Anyways. I'm bored today and my myspace looks pretty dank. THAT'S RIGHT NICOLETTE I SAID DANK. Suck it up.

Anyhoww. I think that spring break, and summer is going to be pretty amazing..

So yep.

payceee.


ali

HACKED!

Hi. Aliya is a faggot<3

OH P.S.

Fan club opens in a week. I am SO not paying $40+(-5) dollars to go to concerts I can already go too.

But this summer, I want to go to the Clique Girlz and Raven concert!! hahaha! And get VIP for that.. I love Raven!

Choices

Wow. So so so much stuff has happened already this year. Starting with New Years and that weird Jonas performance. But other than Jonas stuff..

Let's see, I went to a concert, OH WAIT THAT'S JONAS. I saw Alyssa, and a few other people. Man, so much planned for this summer too.

It's almost spring break and I can't help but wonder what I am doing sitting here, not planning things for spring break. Summer is jam-packed with friends coming, and working. It's just gonna be crazy. But I am so excited because a few of my best friends are coming. But for anyone reading this you need to know that my life is pretty boring. HA.

School is rough, but not so bad. People always think that drama is going to be like all up in highschool, when the truth of the matter is, drama actually simmers down freshman year.. which for me, I was so happy to have happen. In middle school we had SO MUCH drama. And not like interesting drama either, just like the annoying "NO I LIKE HIM" drama. I think the only drama I have had personally this year, is whether or not to take the AP Euro exam.. more not.

So, I saw my counselor or whatever a few weeks ago, and we talked abotu college and stuff.. and well, I decided that I want to go to NYU. NYU has an AMAZING medical program - if that's even what I decide to do with my life. At this point, I don't even know what color shoes I am wearing tomorrow.

Making choices in life are a huge part of a persons life in general, but how to make the right one is what matters. I remember last summer(??? I don't remember I am constantly trying to forget this memory all together -- thats why.) But anyways, when I went to the UCLA Acting For the Camera camp, I was slapped silly, and reminded why I hate UCLA. Well, for one thing, the dorms sucked... But back to my point: This man, one of the teachers, no I don't remember his name, nor do I want to, but he said this one thing that will always be burned into my head(maybe it was because when he said it he threw something across the room, or maybe because it was great, either way!) it was about acting, but not really. It was about life. What he said, and I remember writing it down in the notebook(OH YEAH, he did make us take notes, great ehhh? not so much.) But he said, "It's better to make a bad choice, than to make no choice at all." And whether or not he said it, or took it from someone else(illegally may I add), it doesn't matter.

Think about it. Ponder it.

Kay, you better have thought it over, cause it's QUIZ time.

1. You are in the middle of a football game yeah? And you are the quarterback.. and you have to make the call, all on you, no one else is gonna help you. Do you forfeit, or make a choice? You have ten seconds.
1..
2..
10.

Well, if you said forfeit, you aren't just a loser, but you're also stupid. A quarterback makes decisions, right there on the spot. If you are put in a situation in your life where you have to make quick decisions, you don't just forfeit the game(in this case, life)! NO! You make a decision, even if it's not the right one.

Now kids, this doesn't mean that you drink and drive and get yourself killed. I mean, use your common sense now people ;)

Outties!!

Ali